Welcome to TMI with Cathrine Mahoney, your fortnightly dose of oversharing from a woman who says what most of us think but never admit to. Think 'Bridget Jones' meets 'Eat, Pray, Love' with less yoga and bigger undies. As featured on whim.com
Read MoreAccording to my doctor, I had an "unbalanced vagina."
As I sat there taking in what I had just been told, my imagination went into overdrive. Unbalanced? Would my front-bottom need therapy? I envisioned it sitting back on a leather chair, box of tissues and glass of water to the side, sharing its darkest secrets with a psychologist for $150 an hour. How unbalanced were we talking here, doc?
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If I had to sum myself up on a car bumper sticker it would be a toss up between Born to shop or Born to eat (it certainly wouldn’t be Honk if you’re horny that’s for sure). So with my bumper-sticker-motto in mind you’ll understand how challenging giving up shopping for a year would be, impossible even, but that is exactly what I did, 13 months to be exact.
Read MoreHands on buzzers… What do Helena Christensen, Annie Lennox, Ryan Seacrest, Dido, Humphrey Bogart, The Veronica’s and I all have in common? Anyone? Give-up? Well for those of you playing at home we were all born on Christmas Day.
I was actually due on New Year’s Eve but out I popped, seven days early, which as it turns out was the very first and last time I’ve been early for anything in my life. Was the change in my predicted birth date the reason I love Christmas as much as Will Ferrell in Elf, I don’t know. What I do know is I LOVE being born on Christmas Day. I wouldn’t change it for the world, trust me it’s a bloody brilliant day to have a birthday.
Read MoreNames have always been a ‘thing’ for me, it started way back in 1974 on Christmas morning. I was a week early, I popped out fully cooked before the turkey roasting in the oven did and my folks decided I was Cathrine without an ‘e’. This decision has caused me years of grief and ever since I was old enough I’ve had to correct the spelling of my name. The past 35 or so years have gone a bit like this…..
Read MoreI would never in a million years describe myself as ‘sporty’. Don’t get me wrong I’m not a couch potato, I own my fair share of active wear, but I was just never into team sport. In fact looking back I’d say the only thing I’ve ever been competitive about is getting the last bit of cheese on a shared platter.
Read MoreI am very rarely lost for words, in fact some people would tell you I could talk underwater. Then one car trip my nine year old asked me what the ‘birds & bees’ meant and I choked on my mint and turned the radio up.
Read MoreI am often asked where is it I get inspiration for my stories from. Well actually that’s not true. No one has actually asked me this, maybe one day they will. In my imagination however it’s often one of the things Michael Parkinson asks me as I’m sat opposite him. He’s interviewing me about my epic JK Rowling like, global publishing success. We are having a lovely time chatting away and of course there have been several knee touches from both parties… oh Parky!
Read MoreI seem to be surrounded by a lot of pregnant ladies at the moment. Friends, strangers at the gym, co-workers and even family members are all currently ‘with child’. Hearing updates from my little sister on her pregnancy got me thinking back to when I was up the duff…
I will never forget the moment I found out I was preggers. Feeling a bit off (and with my period slightly late) I got a test from the chemist. It was lunchtime but with test in hand I couldn’t wait till I got home so I did it at work. As soon as the wee hit that stick in the Channel 9 toilet cubicle and the double lines popped up my tummy popped out.
Read MoreI don’t know about you but bloody hell I have been lucky when it has come to my career. Hands down I feel like I’ve had some of the best jobs in the world… okay maybe with the exception of my stint as a dish pig when I was 14 at a restaurant (and I use that term loosely) at a motorway services in South Wales. Anyway as well as feeling like I have hit the employment jackpot I have also been pretty lucky not to get the sack on several occasions.
Read MoreSo here I am again for what feels like the 100th time in four years. I am surrounded by boxes, sheets of butchers’ paper, sat crossed legged on the floor and hopelessly trying to find the sodding end of the packing tape. Yep moving, you officially suck.
This time though I am packing up to move in with a really rather amazing man so all the time spent on hold to call centers around the world trying to disconnect and then reconnect utilities is worth it. As I am working out piles of things to keep, give to St Vinnie’s and possessions to throw out my thoughts take me back to a home a few moves ago...
Read MoreEver since I can remember I’ve been windy. In life you either seem to be a mouth burper or a bottom popper. I was a card-carrying member of the later group. I can’t belch for the life of me, although some people can burp the entire national anthem - imagine that!
Much to my Mothers horror my wind was so infamous it was referenced in two of the four wedding speeches on my big day…. actually make that three I just remembered I referenced it.
Read MoreBeing a parent is hard. Really, really, really, really hard.
I found adult’ing (I may have made that word up but hey it’s kind of cool) bloody difficult enough. Let alone looking after another human.
Then I got knocked up and next thing I know, well technically nine months on, me and my partner were handed this squishy slightly alien bundle, and life as we knew it disappeared in a puff of smoke and feeding schedules. Welcome to the world of sore backs, sleepless nights and leaky nipples – and that’s just the Dad’s.
Read MoreAs a one-television family I’m currently trying to find shows that the ‘small one’ and I can watch together. It is a real struggle. He’s not one for The Handmaids Tale and if I have to watch one more episode of Uncle Grandpa (Pizza Steve in case you are reading this I really hate you) the TV remote may go through the screen…
Read MoreAs a true Brit abroad I have tried to maintain some of my English heritage and culture. I enjoy a cup of Earl Grey daily, I inhale all the BBC drama I can get my hands on and I bloody LOVE me a bath.
Read MoreAs a chronic over-sharer and as someone who’s personal filter got clogged up years ago you can expect me to write first and think second. I can’t help myself. My need to over-share started back when I was eight. My best friend at school was Zoe Woolls (and a million years later she is still my BFF), my favourite thing in the world was to make her laugh.
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